A glimpse into my thoughts...

I know I promised stories and pictures from my trip but our wireless router isn't working, so I am unable to get online on my laptop and that is where all of the pictures are. Ugh. Hopefully we'll have it up and running very soon. It's driving me crazy.

Until then, Ill give a bit of a rundown on last night.

We had a house show last night. Two bands came and played in our great room and nearly 50 people showed up for it! It was a really great time. Bradley Hathaway, a gifted poet and songwriter performed and while his style is very unique, it was also very intriguing and left me speechless. The Ember Days are a worship a band from New Zealand and they came and played at The Red Door venue (for those of you new to my blog, The Red Door was a music venue my family owned and operated for a year and it closed down this past December...RIP). So, I had heard them before and was quite impressed with their musical talent as well as their pure hearts. They are truly anointed worshipers and our home was filled with gorgeous melodies and harmonies to the Lord. It was very serene and peaceful. I absolutely loved it.

Afterwards, we all gathered around insturments in various rooms in our house and everyone was singing or playing something. It was SO much fun! Someone recently blessed us with a really nice keyboard, just gave it to us! My parents purchased a piano for me years ago that I love dearly but I had been wanting a nice keyboard for some time now so this came as a surprise, a very pleasant one.

While I was on vacation, I was somewhat forced to sing and play piano twice in two different churches. I hadn't sang or played in front of a large crowd in I don't know how long and I was extremely nervous (as I always am) but once my fingers hit the keys and I opened my mouth, I was so at peace. I love making music and I love it even more when it is a sound of worship to my sweet Jesus. I have neglected to do what I have such a passion for due to my insecurity, fear and nervousness. I need not be so fixated on doing everything perfectly and more concerned with lavishing praise and giving Jesus the worship He so deserves.

Lately, I have been so aimless. I know what I want, desperately but I often resent any opportunity that comes my way. Why? I believe it's because I feel ridiculously unworthy and unqualified for what I see as such a high honor. I was reminded last night that NO ONE is exactly "worthy". We're all a bunch of humans, sinners and sometimes ungrateful people who are blessed to have the opportunity of knowing Jesus and living for Him. We didn't deserve what He did and still don't. I take His mercy and grace for granted and yet He still extends it to me what I am so in need of it. This alone gives me reason to worship Him.

I know this was kind of random but it was just something that was on my heart.