Thursday, November 19, 2009


With my family leaving, I had to find a place to live. Thank the Lord for the precious Boren family whom I have known for 10 years. They are more like family than anything. Undoubtedly some of the dearest friends we have. Meagan is my best friend and has been since we were 11 and 12 and her little sister, Kayla is best friends with my little sister, Hannah. Our Moms and Dads are very close friends and having Mrs. Lisa during this time in my life has been nothing but an absolute blessing. She's more or less like a second Mom to me. Love them all.

They're letting me have/rent out their spare bedroom for now. So sweet. I love living with them so far. Meagan and Kayla are more like sisters than anything and I'm quite used to a house full of girls with lots of clothes and accessories to share. We have a good time. Love it and I love them dearly!

Meagan, Myself and Kayla.

So thankful that I have a wonderful place to live for now.

Still so unsure about the future, though. Meagan and I have been talking about renting our own place soon. That could mean me staying in Pensacola longer than I expected depending on certain things. Crazy times.

Happy Thursday sweet friends!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The babies are boomin'!

Is it just me or does it seem like every blog has turned into a pregnancy and/or motherhood blog?!

Don't get me wrong, I love it! I just find it ironic that it's all happening at the same time. Something in the water?

I'm excited for all of my fellow bloggers and new mommies to be. It's fun and very interesting to read about your progress and then watch as you welcome your precious babes into the world. I really find much joy in it.

Lots of babies are coming to a blog near you! Nearly 80% of my blogroll is pregnant. :) I love it.

Congrats to all of you very special ladies. I couldn't be happier for you!


I had a mega scare.

I was under the impression that I may not be able to go to Charlotte and be with my family this Thanksgiving due to work related issues. Yesterday, I was more than stressed and completely down about the entire situation.

This morning my boss assured me that I could, in fact take next Wednesday off to drive up there. Thank you, Lord! I honestly didn't know how I was going to tell my mom that I wasn't going to be able to come. Ay. She would have lost it.

I can't wait to be with my family. I miss them more than words can express. Thanksgiving is by far one of my all time favorite holidays with Christmas following close behind. It's weird to think that I won't be with them for the entire Holiday season. That makes me really sad. I get 4 days off for Christmas and we're all going to West Virginia to be with my Mom's side of the family. I am stoked! We haven't spent a holiday with them since I was little. I am very close with them. It will be wonderful! I'm very much looking forward to it.

Life is still crazy in every way possible. I'm not even really taken by surprise anymore. I'm embracing this season of my life with pure intentions and an open mind and heart. At least thats what I'm telling myself. Pshhh. Who am I kidding?

It looks as though I'll have someone accompanying me in my travels to Charlotte next week per their sweet offer. Take a wild guess as to who it might be...

My, oh my.

Friday, November 13, 2009

I'm a mess.

I am currently dealing with way too many sicknesses all at one blessed time. Lord, have mercy.

I'm almost positive that I have a severe case of strep throat. Maybe the feeling that I have a golf ball with sharp edges lodged in my throat would give me reason to believe so? My sinuses detest me and are doing anything and everything in their power to ensure that I am miserable and unable to breathe.

AF made her debut yesterday and not in a polite manner whatsoever. She rudely stormed in and did as she pleased without my consent and with no forewarning. Discourteous.

My gums around my wisdom teeth are red, seriously inflamed and swollen thus causing extreme pain and discomfort inside of my mouth. I can't even chew. Unfortunately, I don't get dental insurance until January 2010. Hopefully, I don't die from infection before then.

Between an insanely sore throat, intense sinus difficulties, painful cramping and severe tooth and gum grief, I just don't even know where to begin with the meds. I don't even know what all I took last night and I'm already leary about medicine. I hate taking medicine. However, I'm way too miserable to not try anything.

It feels as though my body has turned on me and is attempting to assault and attack me in every form possible.

It might be winning.


Thursday, November 12, 2009


Definitely watched the CMA's last night. Loved it. I am a definite country music fan, not ashamed. Between Carrie Underwood's sheer beauty, phenominal wardrobe and incredible voice and range, Brad Paisley's insane guitar pickin' and riffs and sexy Keith Urban lighting up the stage with his usual star quality performance, I would have to say that that I was very pleased.

Taylor Swift is kicking butt and taking names with all the awards she received this year. Not to mention, Entertainer of the Year. I love Taylor, I really do but I just think she is absolutely horrible live. Is anyone with me on this? Her voice is so pitchy and she goes flat all too often. I'm not discrediting her by any means as I have all due respect for her as a musician and a writer and I own all of her albums. She just isn't good live, plain and simple. She seems so sweet and I really do love all of her music (just as long as it's the cd).

Lady Antebellum is a new favorite for me. They kind of up and came out of nowhere but their music is fantastic, in my opinion! Loved seeing them perform.

All in all, I really enjoyed it this year. All of the jokes geared at Kanye West were pretty funny even as they have been worn out recently. I laughed (out loud, have you).

Happy Thursday everyone! :)

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

So there's this situation...

Why is it so difficult to return to your blog when you've been absent for more than so many days? I think I just get overwhelmed and begin feeling disconnected from all of you sweet folk and I don't like it, one bit. So, here I go...

I hope this post finds all of you enjoying this wonderful day. I have been an extremely poor commenter but that does not mean I have not been reading as of late. :)

Life is...crazy, point blank. I wish so badly that I could unravel and elaborate on the series of events that have transpired over the last two weeks but to be on the rather safe side, I will try not to go into too much detail.. Just know that it's kind of a big deal and it may or may not have to do with a certain (and ONLY) someone who I dated 3 years ago. Yeah, the only boyfriend I have ever had in my entire life has somehow made his way back into my life and may or may not be trying to win my heart again and it may be working. There are way too many details and history there that it would take me hours to fill you all in on. It feels really good in a sense to have this familiarity in my life, at this very strange state I'm finding myself in lately. I am just afraid that I am too vulnerable and sensitive at this season in my life to make a hasty decision.

I'm thoroughly enjoying his company and he has done the absolute sweetest things in the entire world to ensure that I am happy and content. I can't even put into words the lengths and efforts that he has gone to in order to show that he still cares about my wellbeing and happiness. So sweet. It is so very flattering and inevitably makes me feel amazing but on another level, it also kind of scares me.

You see, I'm the one who broke things off 3 years ago. Apparently (according to all of our friends), he has never gotten over me. :Melting heart: Such a good guy, really.

So, here's where I am finding myself...

Confused. Analytical. Frustrated. Happy. Content. Scared. Freaked out. Unsure.

Prayer seems to really be the only thing that could possibly help at this point.

I don't deal well with outside pressure and there are so many people either rooting for us to get back together or vice versa. Oh, another big problem...I care WAY too much about other people's opinions. Ridiculous, I know.

He made me the most thoughful gift anyone has EVER given to me in my life. He took hundreds of pictures off of my facebook from every era of my life and had them printed in black and white and made the most beautiful collage/montage of my life in pictures. It's MASSIVE. It had to have taken him hours upon hours. I can't even imagine. He brought it to where I was staying and set it up for me with a card to come upon when I got home from work. I was speechless when I saw it. I seriously couldn't even wrap my mind around it. There are pictures from when I was a baby to pretty much every vital season in my life- all of my friends, family, animals, the house I grew up in etc. It's incredible. Seriously, I think you all have probably already gathered that I am an extremely sentimental person. Pictures are SO important to me. This gift was above and beyond amazing in every aspect. It sits in a beautiful frame (made to fit the picture) with the words etched in the middle... "Every season runs it's course but family is an eternal constant". Simply beautiful.

I don't understand this love and admiration for me.

I have no idea.

I know his pursuit spoiled me. He pursued me for almost two years before we started dating and he did the most insane things and really put his heart on the line to be with me. I compare any guys interest in me to his. If a guy professes he wants to go out with me, I want him to chase me. Crazy, I know.

I don't understand it.

He's special to me and holds a very dear place in my heart but I'm scared to go there again.

I never in a million years saw this coming. I'm not even so sure what is going on, to be honest.

Oh pray for me, ladies.


Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Oh life.

My oh my.

How things change. Continually learning.

We're all moved out and moving day definitely tops as one of the most difficult days of my entire life. It was emotionally draining and exhausting in every aspect. I didn't get much sleep during the month of October with all of the packing, moving sales and then final moving day on the weekends. Needless to say, the immense lack of sleep most definitely attributed to my emotions and state. I was quite a sight to behold.

So many of our friends came out and helped all day long. It was such a blessing and truly reminded us of how loved we are. We really do know some of the most incredible people! So blessed.

The day was so long and drawn out. Oh and to top it off, not all of our stuff fit in the truck. Lovely indeed. We rented a storage unit and were forced to make trips back and forth with all the leftover junk. So much fun.

My family left last Sunday and made their way across 3 states away from me :( I miss them so very much. It is so weird not seeing them every day.

They endured some extreme hardships along the way but God remained faithful and steadfast and only proved to them that they were in His will. It seemed as though it was the final test. They handled their circumstance with grace and dignity and prayed and God came through for them. It's quite a story. I assume my mom will write about it in her blog at some point. With my not being there, I just could not do the story justice. So, I will post a link when she writes about the happenings.

While I am beyond happy for my family and their new adventures, I don't like the idea of getting used to not seeing them all of the time...

It looks as though I just might have to, though.

As of last week, I made the decision that I will be staying in Pensacola until at least January or so. I'm not really quite sure what triggered this huge change of mind and heart but it happened. I have never essentially been "on my own" before and I believe that this will be a very crucial time in my life to grow and learn. I could very well be making the worst decision by choosing to stay but it is my decision and if it ends up being a bad one, I will own up to it.

I have a track record for always doing what everyone else wants me to do and when and how they want me to do it. This will honestly be the first time in my life that I've made a decision for "me". I know that may sound really selfish but I kind of want to be selfish right now, as horrible as that sounds. I just want to experience this and I want to explore and find out for "me" what is the best thing at the right time. Does that make sense?

It breaks my heart that my family is so sad about me not coming when I had proposed and honestly my emotions have been swaying and changing so much but this is the decision that I have made and I am sticking to it.

Life really does have a way of unexpectedly taking you by complete and utter surprise.

So much has happened between my last post and now. SO MUCH. It feels as though these last 10 days have more or less like 6 months with all of the changes I have experienced and undergone. It's absolutely insane. I have a lot to catch up on, reading-wise and posting. Bear with me. I'm getting back into the swing of things, my friends. :)