good weekend. great family. amazing boyfriend.

My family came in town this past weekend. I had been anticipating it for weeks and it was here and then it was gone. So fast. I miss them so much already.

My lovely sisters and I. Seriously, how beautiful are they?

All of us with Mom right before they left :(

It was a wonderful weekend. Can't wait to see them again in just a few weeks.

Monday, I got the sweetest surprise visit at work from my sweet Ben. He brought me a bouquet of beautiful flowers along with the sweetest card. I love him so much.

The Fair.

Ben and I went on a double date with our friends to the Fair on Friday night.

We had a good time but the "Tiniest Woman in the World" freak show made me sad. I don't know what on earth possessed us to pay 50 cents to walk in and see her. It was heartbreaking to me and ruined my whole entire night.

However, here are some photos of our fun before things got all weird and sad...

We ate a funnel cake, too.

ramblin'

Time is breezing by with no intention of slowing down. I'm sure of it. I can't seem to catch up with it and it's freaking me out. Um, WHERE did October go? It was just here and in like 4 days, it will be gone. Is it really almost Christmas? Again? Already? I feel like I haven't even had time to enjoy October. Before I know it, it will be thanksgiving and then I'll blink my eyes and it will be Christmas. Maybe I should try to stop blinking?

Goodness gracious. They say it only goes faster as you grow older. Can that please be a lie? Because if it's going to go more quickly than this- I'm seriously freaked out.

This month marks a year that Ben and I have been back together. How crazy is that? And I can't believe it's already been a year since my family moved. This is crazy.

I feel like these next few weeks/months will be like oh hey, happyhalloweenthanksgivingmerrychristmashappynewyear.

Why is it that when you anticipate something for so long, it goes SO quickly when it finally gets here?

I hope the Holidays aren't like that this year. They were like that last year.

Admittance to my social network addiction and attempt to "cool it", Alvarez and Fall things.

I haven't been very good at social networking, period to be honest with you. I have quite a few comments and messages to respond to and I'm lagging behind.

Tennessee was fabulous. So fabulous. We were disconnected from the world and it was glorious.

Sometimes, I wanna throw all of my techie things off of my balcony but then I know I'll be so sad and mad at myself. It's kinda sad how dependant I've become upon social networking. I'm starting to realize how engrossed I really am. Then again, it's a great way to keep in contact but when I look at my phone more than I do a person I'm having a conversation with, SOMETHING IS CLEARLY WRONG.

I'm trying to change this and not be so addicted to computers and my phone. Sheesh.

Last night Ben and I carved a Pumpkin.

He's a Panda Bear and we named him Alvarez. I love him.

A Five Guys opened in Pensacola today. 2.12 miles from my house. This is very good but also very bad.

The fair comes into town this week. Tomorrow to be exact.

I want to go to a corn maze.

I love candy corn.

I love this time of year. Fall is the BEST.

Hope you're all having a great fall thus far!

Update with a recipe and a birthday boy!

It's been a while...

Cold weather has made it's debut. Fall is officially here. Life is busy and grand.

Ben's brithday is tomorrow! He'll be 24. So, I did what any good girlfriend would do and I baked him a cake and planned a surprise dinner with our friends for him. It turned out fabulous. I am so thankful.

I figured I would share the recipe for this delicious strawberry cake with chocolate covered strawberries because it is like NO OTHER. (It's my mom's recipe, by the way)

Ingredients:

Strawberry cake mix (Preferrably the "Moist Supreme Pillsbury" brand)

Betty Crocker Cream Cheese Icing

Fresh Strawberries

White Chocolate Almond Bark

Milk Chocolate Almond Bark

1. Follow instructions on the back of cake mix. (3 eggs, 1/3 cup of vegetable oil and 1 cup of water)

2. Pour into very well greased bundt pan and bake for approximately 37 min at 350 degrees.


3. While waiting for cake to bake, melt your chocolate and begin dipping the strawberries in both the white and milk chocolate. (This recipe only calls for 10 strawberries but I always make extra for everyone)


4. Place your cake on a plate/tray to cool.

5. Finish dipping your strawberries.

6. Once cake is cool, place cream cheese icing into microwave for approximately 30 seconds (or until melted) and pour over cake, evenly distributing.

7. Adorn cake with chocolate covered strawberries (5 white chocolate and 5 milk chocolate)

8. Enjoy!

Ben had no idea. We showed up to the restarurant and many of our friends were there waiting for us. It was wonderful and the cake was a hit!

Lighting it up- all 24 candles :)

The Birthday Boy!

Happy Birthday, babe! So blessed to able to celebrate your life with you and I hope this is the best birthday yet!

We leave for Tennessee early in the morning to visit some of his family. Let the celebrations continue...

wow, mega growth.

I straightened my hair for the first time in probably 3 or 4 months and the difference in length is INSANE.

You have no idea.

I've been trying to get my hair long for forever and I'm finally here. FINALLY.

Ben and his goofy faces. Love him :)

September 11, 2001.

Like so many others I vividly remember every intricate detail about that day. Awaking to my mom in tears as she somberly broke the news and watching in utter terror the attacks that came upon our nation. It felt as though the world as I knew it was coming to an end and in those moments, my eyes were glued to what I was beholding. It seemed so surreal.

Today marks 9 years since the tragic day we were attacked on our soil and so many lost their lives due to the fatal brutality of terrorism. So many spouses, children, loved ones, friends and co-workers were affected by these heinous acts and may we never ever forget the lives that were lost that day. May we never forget those who sacrificed their lives heroically to save another and may we never forget those who grasped the gravity of the moment and understood the threat as they courageously took matters into their own hands on Flight 93 when they realized their fate. May we never ever forget.

Today I mourn with those who mourn. As an American Citizen affected by these events I can't help but be somber and respectful as I look back and commemorate those who made a difference in their actions and lovingly and notably reached out to those in need. The self sacrifice expressed through their actions is a picture of true love and of true brotherhood- "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13. I am humbled by those sacrifices. Our country was forever changed that day and there can be no denying that despite these grave occurrences there was a unity in our Nation that truly did something unexplainable.

Sometimes it's hard for me to believe all of the things I have witnessed throughout my life that will undoubtedly go down in history. The things that shook our nation, brought us closer as well as all of the things that have divided our nation. I imagine that we will behold so much more- it's undeniable.

I do not think that we realize how unbelievably blessed we truly are. We gripe and complain about so many little things that really have no significance compared to the trials and losses of others. Today, I remember the heroes and I remember all of the innocent blood shed and I can't help but sit here, tears streaming down my face in disbelief and in utter gratefulness that I am an American and that God has blessed me in ways unimaginable.

Many things have changed since that September morning in 2001 but one thing remains constant, the bond that every American now shares; unspoken but strong, we came together as a nation that day regardless of religion, race or creed and today we stand united on this 9th anniversary to remember the heroes of 9/11.

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted"- Matthew 5:4

So, say a prayer for those mourning today. Say a prayer for our troops. Say a prayer for our Nation and it's leaders. Say a prayer for the future of our Nation.

Never forget and be grateful because we truly are blessed beyond belief.

Much Love,

-Amber

Recap.

I don't know why I always feel as though I need an explanation for my absence so this time, I have no explanation. I could contribute it to being busy, having nothing to write about, not feeling like writing, etc. etc. Instead, I'll just say hey! :)

Last weekend was so good. SO good. I was able to spend some quality time with my sweet sister. The time went by way too quickly though. I am so thankful that it worked out for her to come and to have had the special quality time that we did.

It's crazy to think that we're both adults now, working real jobs and having so much more responsibility than we did just a few short years ago.

I never really imagined myself living away from my family and yes, I miss them more than you can even imagine but I know that this season of growth and maturity has been so crucial in my life.

It was definitely a treat to have Ashton visit me here and we had such a wonderful time!

And now for pictures...

Ash and I.


My love and I.

Ashton and Christie both came into town. Christie lives in California. We all attended a going away party for dear friends of ours.

My love and I again.

Antiquing.

Dinner with our grandparents :)

Don't leave :(

It was fabulous. Wish it didn't have to end.

yay.

My sister is in town!

I'm really happy about it.

Hope you all have a wonderful labor day weekend!

fantastic.

I have officially entered the iworld and I purchased the iphone 4.

I LOVE IT.

Had a superb weekend with the loveliest of people.

Enjoyed being lazy, snuggling up and watching movies with the sweetest boyfriend that ever lived.


Got to be a spectator while Ben tracked drums for one of our dear friend's EP's. He's the best drummer EVER.

Enjoyed testing out my handy dandy iphone camera.

Loved having cloudy skies and rain.

Did lots of smiling.

'Twas a lovely weekend, indeed.

And to top it off, I have a lot to look forward to in the coming weeks!

Hope you all had a splendid weekend!

I can do anything.

I fixed my broken camera, myself.

Pictures soon.

Tapestry.

I was not a timid toddler to say the least. Conversation came natural to me and I never met a stranger. I began communicating quite efficiently at the tender age of two. I watch home videos of myself now and am absolutely stunned by my annunciation and word usage. Quite impressive.

I was the epitome of "big sister", as in, I always felt the need to sort of lead. Looking back on tapes, I see myself constantly assuring Ashton that she is a "good girl" and using words such as "sweetie" and "honey" as if there is more than the mere 16 months between us. It's actually quite adorable. It's amazing to look back on pictures and old home movies and watch this little person who is essentially, me. Amazing. I remember my childhood extremely well and was always such a happy little girl. I absolutely loved to talk and sing and would entertain anyone and everyone. I was in love with making people laugh and smile.

I would love to travel back in time and revisit those sweet memories. Being little had so many perks. There were no worries or concerns other than when you left your play-dough out by accident and it dried out, or worrying that we'd get caught doing something we knew was wrong. You know, such as sneaking cookie dough, staying up past bedtime giggling, and not being allowed to play with the neighbor girl for some reason that we were not aware of. 'Twas an easy and carefee little life we lived. Oh how things change as you grow.

I'm quite positive that I had the wildest imagination. This may have been due to the fact that I began reading earlier than usual. I was hungry to learn and found delight and pure pleasure in books. I remember how excited I was when I went to Kindergarten and learned that there was a vending machine for books! My heart skipped a beat as I slipped my quarter in to retrieve my first "Clifford, the Big Red Dog" book. From then on, I developed a vast love for books and proceeded to absorb all that I possibly could while reading. I thank for my Mom for passing this down to me.

As I grew older and changed, I became more reserved. A shy-ness crept in and plastered me with insecurites. I was no longer the "entertainer" and I withheld much. My sister and I actually switched roles. She was the one with hoards of friends and acquaintences while my close circle remained in tact. I sort of kept to myself and was overly sensitive. I cried over the most ridiculous things. I didn't whine, I genuinely shed tears because I was so easily hurt. I look back now and realize how utterly ridiculous I was, but at the time, my tender heart was so fragile that if someone ignored me or said my hair looked funny, I would hide and bawl my little eyes out. Little things would bother me for weeks, even months. I felt as though I had to gain and keep my friends by doing favors for them and even found myself doing their homework at times in order to maintain their friendship. I allowed myself to be taken advantage of and I did it with a smile on my face. I didn't know how to be tough and I was most definitely NEVER one to tease back, nor was I one to exclude. I hated the thought of hurting someone, as it essentially hurt me.

In 3rd grade, my teacher was a close friend of our family and she did not want to seem as though she was favoring me in any way, that she actually ended up shunning me. I remember coming home on several occasions crying because I was hardly allowed to demonstrate during class and during competitions and contests, I wasn't allowed to win. It was hurtful. Little things like this had a huge effect on me. I over analyzed even as an 8 year old. My brain is just programmed to think much too hard and come up with ridiculous scenarios as to terrify myself into believing the craziest things.

I was an extremely awkward and insecure pre-teen and teen. You really have no idea. It wasn't until I was about 15 that I began to come into myself as I grew and learned how to do my hair and make-up. (Thank God for that!) I can honestly look back on my teen years as being absolutely amazing though there was much heartache to endure. I had a blast and do not feel as though I missed out on anything. I thank God for allowing me to be apart of a church that, though in the end was a huge disappointment and let down, ultimately taught me more than I ever would have dreamed to know. I'm thankful for everything that occured, even the most difficult of situations. God shone through everything and shed light on so many things in my life through it all.

It's amazing how I can see attributes and characteristics that have carried down from my toddler, childhood, preteen and teen years. Of course, it all makes me who I am and I am all of this...

I am talkative and still feel the need to "mother" my siblings.
I am outgoing, silly and love making people smile and laugh.
I am introverted, shy, reserved, insecure and still a people pleaser.
I am sensitive, analytical and secretive, as in I bottle up my emotions easily.
I love to read, write and learn.
I am awkward and crazy, even weird.
I am loving, faithful and loyal.
I am learning and growing every single day, with every single situation I undergo and every aspect of life is uniquely beautiful.

I'm in love with a man who knows and loves all of my quirks. Ben has stood by me through some of the most difficult times and I can honestly say that I don't even know if I could have put up with me through it all. He's so patient with me and though my setbacks can put a strain on things at times, he is always more than willing to listen to me and let me soak his shoulder, if need be. I am blessed to have a relationship where I can be myself at all times. I never feel as though I have to mask anything. I can say weird things and ask ridiculous questions without feeling as though I may cause him not to like me anymore. I'm secure in his love and affection for me and even though I may not be the best at conveying my feelings, they are there and they are very real.

My life is like that of a tapestry and though what I may see from below is a mess of colors and string, when turned over is a crisp, clear, colorful picture that essentially screams, me.

I am blessed.

Impacted.

Tears streaming down my face.

Due to a facebook status of someone I went to Bible college with years ago- a simple statement about a 26 year old young woman who passed into eternity today. It linked me to her facebook where there were literally hundreds of comments from people all over the world who were/are so impacted and touched by this young Missionary woman.

My heart is heavy.

I found her blog through her facebook as well as many other links and stories about this girl's life- a woman who has traveled to 20 different countries and committed her life fully and completely to reaching the lost and hurting, teaching foreign children, loving the unloved and uncared for and literally giving up her life to gain SO much more in return.

She died from a blood clot in her brain this morning.

I didn't know her. I've never heard of her but I know people who do.

I just read her blog and also read a tribute to her here.

Needless to say, I'm deeply moved.

“If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself,
and take up his cross, and follow Me."
-Matthew 6:24-

"Denying of self" desperately needs to take place in my life.

RIP Joy Bausum. Thank you for heeding the call and touching so many lives, mine included.

"Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints."

Psalm 116:15

testing.

I'm alive, I promise.

Just arrived home yesterday after making a last minute trip to surprise my family in Charlotte, NC. It was so much fun. They had no idea.

Ben and I showed up at 3:00 am on Wednesday morning and startled everyone with the exception of my sister, Ashton -who let us in.

It was a much needed trip. I'm missing them so much already :(

Not much else is new.

Hymn.

"If to distant lands I scatter

If I sail to farthest seas

Would you find and firm and gather

'til I only dwell in Thee?

If I flee from greenest pastures

Would you leave to look for me?

Forfeit glory to come after
'Til I only dwell in Thee

If my heart has one ambition

If my soul one goal to seek

This my solitary vision 'til I only dwell in Thee

That I only dwell in Thee

'Til I only dwell in Thee"