Tuesday, May 19, 2009

I know I promised stories and pictures from my trip but our wireless router isn't working, so I am unable to get online on my laptop and that is where all of the pictures are. Ugh. Hopefully we'll have it up and running very soon. It's driving me crazy.

Until then, Ill give a bit of a rundown on last night.

We had a house show last night. Two bands came and played in our great room and nearly 50 people showed up for it! It was a really great time. Bradley Hathaway, a gifted poet and songwriter performed and while his style is very unique, it was also very intriguing and left me speechless. The Ember Days are a worship a band from New Zealand and they came and played at The Red Door venue (for those of you new to my blog, The Red Door was a music venue my family owned and operated for a year and it closed down this past December...RIP). So, I had heard them before and was quite impressed with their musical talent as well as their pure hearts. They are truly anointed worshipers and our home was filled with gorgeous melodies and harmonies to the Lord. It was very serene and peaceful. I absolutely loved it.

Afterwards, we all gathered around insturments in various rooms in our house and everyone was singing or playing something. It was SO much fun! Someone recently blessed us with a really nice keyboard, just gave it to us! My parents purchased a piano for me years ago that I love dearly but I had been wanting a nice keyboard for some time now so this came as a surprise, a very pleasant one.

While I was on vacation, I was somewhat forced to sing and play piano twice in two different churches. I hadn't sang or played in front of a large crowd in I don't know how long and I was extremely nervous (as I always am) but once my fingers hit the keys and I opened my mouth, I was so at peace. I love making music and I love it even more when it is a sound of worship to my sweet Jesus. I have neglected to do what I have such a passion for due to my insecurity, fear and nervousness. I need not be so fixated on doing everything perfectly and more concerned with lavishing praise and giving Jesus the worship He so deserves.

Lately, I have been so aimless. I know what I want, desperately but I often resent any opportunity that comes my way. Why? I believe it's because I feel ridiculously unworthy and unqualified for what I see as such a high honor. I was reminded last night that NO ONE is exactly "worthy". We're all a bunch of humans, sinners and sometimes ungrateful people who are blessed to have the opportunity of knowing Jesus and living for Him. We didn't deserve what He did and still don't. I take His mercy and grace for granted and yet He still extends it to me what I am so in need of it. This alone gives me reason to worship Him.

I know this was kind of random but it was just something that was on my heart.

8 comments:

inkOBSESSIONdesigns said...

The house show sounds like it was so much fun!

I know what you mean about that aimless feeling...I get that way sometimes too. I just keep trying to remind myself that even if I think I am unworthy of something, obviously other people think I am worthy. I need to learn to give myself the benefit of the doubt a little bit more but it is really hard sometimes!

Jessica said...

It's great to have you back! I'm so glad that you had a great time and had great things waiting for you on your schedule when you got back. That always helps to ease the transition back to reality.

Jessica said...

I wish I could hear you sing and play.

Lindsey said...

Sounds like so much fun!!

DocE said...

I really enjoy reading about your passion for music, where it comes from, and why it speaks to/for you. What a wonderful night you write about here - makes me remember my days in a band/choir-type thing. Sometimes it's good to feel a bit aimless, great creativity and inspiration come from aimlessness - even though it can be such a drag to be in it. hang in and welcome back.

C said...

Aww I want to hear you sing & play! Make us a video girl!

Danya said...

You're so good at updating Amber! I wish I were better at it. I'm so glad you've returned safely and I'm so proud of you for sharing your musical gifts!! I hope we get to meet up soon! Lots of love...d

AmberDenae said...

Hmm, maybe I will make a video of my sister and I singing sometime. :)