good for my soul.

"That is the best - to laugh with someone because you both think the same things are funny."

You know what makes you feel good?

When kids like you.

Friday afternoon, a little girl walked in our office with her mother. I glanced at her, smiled and waved and she waltzed right over, jumped in my lap and sat with me the entire time. It was absolutely precious.

Made my day, really.

I had a fabulous weekend. Back to the grind today. Oh, Monday.

Hey, friday.

1. Ben left for the weekend today. Bummer. Good thing it's only for the weekend. Bad thing that I won't get to hang out with him this weekend. Good thing I have fun things planned. Bad thing he won't be here for them. Ah well. Such is life.

2. Yesterday, work was fun. The other girls in the office and I literally laughed until we cried and I honestly couldn't even really tell you what it was about. It felt good though and needless to say, we didn't really get anything done yesterday afternoon. I think we're alloted that for all the work that we do get done though, right? Sure.

3. My boyfriend is sweet. He really spoils me. This is my "I know you love me and will do anything I ask" when I want something face. He always gives in. Most always, at least.

4. I had scorching coffee this morning that burned my tongue and now it feels like sand paper. This is really not good.

5. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to see through someone elses eyes? Like do people with brown eyes see colors differently than people with green eyes? For instance, we all know and have been taught colors and shades but what if your blue was my orange or so on and so forth. Does that make sense? It's really a little bit frustrating to think about, but I just can't help but wonder. And how would anyone ever know? You could never look through somoene elses eyes. Ever. So, you just never know. It's kind of like people saying that dogs see in black and white. I beg to differ. My dog knew colors. I know it. How would anyone ever be able to tell that anyway? Or people saying when you have a dream that you're falling and if you don't wake up before you hit the ground, you will die in your sleep. Again, how is this really and truly proven? Ah, I could go on and on. For the sake of yours and even, my own sanity, I'll stop.

6. Sometimes working in customer service is exasperating. People really should consider what it's like to be in another's shoes. If anything, it has made me empathize with other CSR's out there. Gotta stick together. I truly understand. My motto is "kill em with kindness" and it works most of the time but then there are those ones who are going to be mean, rude and nasty no matter how polite and understanding you seem to be. I would be lying if I said that I never cried about it or took it personally. It's hard not to sometimes. Fellow CSR's, receptionists or anyone that deals with the public on a daily basis- you're incredible.

7. I'm going to the river on Sunday with some of my most favorite people. We're going tubing all day. I'm so excited. You have no idea. I just wish Ben could join. Dangit.

8. I need a vacation. Soon. Really soon. I think it's in the works. It needs to happen and SOON. Do you feel the emphasis on "soon"?

9. I would like to visit a zoo.

10. Have you ever thought about going an entire day without listening to any music whatsoever? Do you think you could do it? I honestly don't think that I could. I think the withdrawl symptoms would be so brutal.

That's all I got.

It's Friday. Rejoice with me!

movie love.

I'm pretty sure we've set a record on how many movies we've gone to this year. Kind of ridiculous. Really ridiculous, actually. Especially considering the amount of money it requires.


However, we love it. And I especially love the Pixar 3D movies. Who doesn't?

They all make me cry. It's pathetic. Toy Story 3- cried. Up- definitely cried. They're just so heartwarming.

We went and saw Despicable Me the other night and it was really cute. Definitely heartfelt, funny and sweet.

I recommend.

Oh and aside from cartoons, Inception is probably the best movie I've seen all year. Astounding. Leo is just my most favorite actor.

So, there are my reviews- for what they're worth.

Happy Thursday.

Belated recap

Of my weekend, that is.

Ben and I went antiquing all day on Saturday and we came upon some pretty fabulous things. Among them is this marvelous Polaroid Land Camera from circa 1957. It's in mint condition and I believe it works! I'm going to attempt to order the film that it takes so I can try her out.

Saturday evening, we went out to hear our friends play music as they are about to relocate to Nashville to pursue their dreams.

Bittersweet.

Alex and I

The boyfriend and I.

Jesse and I. He leaves next week :( So sad.

Jesse and Alex.

Speaking of my friends and their music, you should check them out- "The Gills". They have a fanpage on facebook.

They're in the process of spear heading a non profit organization for children with leukemia. Jesse has a story about fiercely battling leukemia.. Their cause is beautiful and there's a video on facebook that goes more in depth of what their dream and desire is. You can find it here.

I'm so proud of these guys and I know that they are going to do great things. Pensacola is going to be pretty sad when they leave.

All that to say, I had a pretty wonderful weekend. I hope you did as well.

Thank you, Dr. Wisdom.

"We are all a little weird and life's a little weird and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love"

Couldn't be more perfectly put.

heartcry.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me."

Psalm 51:10

I don't need to elaborate much considering this verse essentially speaks for itself.

I'm in dire need of cleansing and refreshing. My little complacent heart is swelling and desperately needs to spill over and lose it's density. I've become despondent and I'm lacking vitality.

I am keenly aware of what steps I must take in order to get where I need to be. It's a process and it starts right here. In this place of vulnerability and transparency. I have to do it for myself, not for anyone else and with no ulterior motive in mind.

"Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit."

Psalm 51:12

friday randoms

1. I was late to work this morning because I was throwing up....TMI? Sorry :/ I think I got food poisoning or something of the like. Maybe not.

2. This would be me after one too many cheeseburgers. Scarrrrrry.

3. I already regret posting this picture.

4. My friend, Beth made me fat with the "fat booth" application on her handy dandy iphone and then posted this picture on facebook. I think I might have a world record of comments on it.

5. I'm ready for the weekend. Ben will be gone next weekend. He gets to go to Los Angeles. I'm not jealous at all.

6. I need a vacation and as soon as possible, please?

7. Banana peppers are delicious and they actually helped settle my stomach. Weird much? I hate pepto bismol.

8. I feel like everyone around me is getting engaged, married and/or having babies and its freaking me out. We're not old enough for this! Wait...dang...we are. Scary.

9. My new favorite snacks are snap pea crisps from publix. (In the greenwise section). Try em.

10. Look at this picture of my sister and I from 2006. I just found it on my old photobucket account. Weird.

I miss her.

Bit of a throwback.

Yesterday I went through some old pictures and came across these...

I used to watch these kiddies once, sometimes even twice a week.

I worked/interned in a spanish church for a little over a year and my most favorite part of my job was hanging with these precious babes. Kinda miss it.

These just touched my heart and I thought I'd share. :)

Happy Wednesday!

Reality check.

Sometimes I get really inspired to write and then when I sit down to actually spill my thoughts out- my mind goes totally and completely blank. It's quite frustrating. Words don't come as easily as they did while I was driving down the road listening to a song that moved me in some way. It's crazy how music does that to you sometimes.

Today, I'm going to simply leave you with a quote. One that you've heard probably more times than one and one that is simple yet profound. Yesterday was a prime live example of what I am about to share.

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."

Yesterday was a bit of a drag for me. I was frustrated with things at the office, totally down that I wasn't able to accompany Ben and his family to Tennessee because of work and just had the typical 'Monday blues" and all that it entails. In other words, being kind did not come as natural as it usually does for me. Sure, I was nice and polite but not the genuine kind that it should be. I just wanted to get through the day and do it as quickly as possible.

I had two encounters yesterday that slapped me in the face and made me so very thankful that despite my immediate selfish and self pitying feelings, I was able to grasp the weight of the moment and reach out and in kindness, touch two broken souls.

One lady who had just lost her daughter 3 short days ago. She was only 28 years old. I knew her because she had insurance with us and had just seen her a month ago. Stage 4 stomach cancer. No warning- just a grim and sudden death that robbed this precious family of their loved one and a 19 month old of his mother. Heartbreaking. I reached out and wrapped my arms around this grieving Mother, my mind not able to even somewhat grasp the grieving and utter heartache she is experiencing, She gripped me tightly and whispered in my ear- "cherish those you love- never take one single day for granted with them". Hot tears streamed down my face and suddenly the little annoyances of the day were totally and completely insignificant and even, shameful to me.

Then the other- a woman who came in to purchase auto insurance with us. She was one of those ones who waited until right before 5:00 to come in. You know how it is when you're about to get off of work for the day and in trots a customer and you're like "Really? It's 4:55- we close in 5 mins?" Honestly, I wasn't really that upset by the matter. However, I was pretty ready to go home as I had been extremely emotional the entire day. Crying on and off. Something I'd much rather do privately within the confines of home. I don't like showing that emotion publicly.

Anyway, she comes in and is gasping for air, has a scarf secured tightly around her balding head and sits down with a smile stretched across her face and says "I'm sorry I'm so late. I know you're about to close but my radiation makes it difficult for me to get out in the sun." Punch in the gut number 2. I assure her that it's my pleasure to assist her and will stay as late as I need to in which she grabs my hand and states "You are a true gem and I thank you". Tears began to surface but I choked them back with great force and finished out the application process with her and chatted a bit as she goes into a little detail of the hardship and battle with cancer that she is undergoing. She thanks me again and her eyes display true appreciation. I just kept thinking of how much she had just taught me.

Right when I left work and got into my car, the floodgates opened up. I couldn't stop my flow of tears and I just kept thanking God over and over and over again for reminding me what it's all about.

It's so easy to allow our emotions, problems, situations and unforunate circumstances determine our attitudes. SO easy. However, I am abundantly thankful for the heaviness and weightiness of this lesson that I learned yesterday. It was surely heavy and it definitely made an enormous impact on me.

So, "Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle".

Melting.

My heart, that is.

I've been so freaking sad that I couldn't accompany Ben and his family to Tennessee this week to meet his somewhat new little nephew, hang out with his sister and her husband as well as his other family.

Ben met his nephew for the first time today and this picture literally made me tear up. (What is it about the man you love holding a baby that is so incredibly beautiful and moving?)

I don't know but this is absolutely precious to me. This picture is worth over a thousand words. I love it.

I love my guy so much.

I so wish I was there.

:(

recap.

My weekend was pretty grand despite having to spend a little over 300 dollars in repairs for my car. In essence, it originally was supposed to be more but they came down some. So, it was unfortunate that I had to drop that large sum of money but also a blessing because it could have been much larger. Car is all better and running great. Relief.

Saturday, I finally picked up my old cameras and camcorders that I purchased. Love them. Who knew that a bin full of old cameras and camcorders that some would deem as "junk" could ensue such excitement? I got them for really cheap. A lot of them appraise for around $55-$70 on ebay. Pretty neat-o.

Saturday afternoon, Ben came over and made me lunch! He knew that I wanted Spain to win the world cup (and I'm SO glad that they did), so he made nachos for us with the most delicious guacamole ever. Boy can cook. So sweet. We watched the World Cup match for 3rd place together and just hung out.

Nacho buffet.


Sunday, Ben came over and we watched the world cup final which wasn't as exciting as I thought it would be and it was kind of stressful. Am I right? I was, however, pleased that Spain won. They deserved it.

It was a lovely weekend, indeed.

birthday.

Today is my sister, Ashton's birthday. 22 years old. That doesn't seem like it's possible. We're only a mere 16 months apart and yes, I'm 23 so it's appropriate but it feels like we should still be kids in so many ways.

Apart from being happy for her because she's having an amazing time with family and friends today, I'm a little sad because a) I can't be there and b) this is the first birthday I've ever missed. See our family makes a huge ordeal out of birthdays. They're a big deal. Always. We love them.

So happy 22 years to my dear sister, partner in crime, best friend, secret keeper and continual encourager. She knows me probably better than just about anyone. We share all of the same memories and she's always been in my corner. Always. I am so blessed to have two of the most amazing, genuine and beautiful sisters and I couldn't be more proud of both of them.

So, here are some sweet photos of my lovely Ashton through the years.

Happy Birthday, Ash! I wish I could be there but we'll make up for it when I come and visit (which will hopefully be SOON). You're amazing and I love you more than you'll ever know!

I don't know what to title this but I feel like a post without a title is pretty lame, so here is a title.

Oh me, oh my.

Last night was going to be so good. I was going to a friend's house to pick up a collection of super sweet vintage cameras and video cameras that we purchased together to split and then Ben and I were going to do something fun.

That plan got royally screwed.

Well, I got to my friend's house and turned off the car to go in to be notified that she was in fact, not home yet. So, I did what any normal person in Florida would do right now- got back in my car to get in some AC because this July heat is nearly unbearable. Turned my key and "click, click, click, click, click...nothing" No vroom vroom vroom.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?!"

"Car, I just put nearly 700 dollars into you and you're supposed to be fixed."

So, when Dads live so far away, it's really great to have a sweet boyfriend who will come to your rescue. There I sat on a hot florida sidewalk downtown beside my sick car in wait for my sweet guy.

It ended up taking over our entire night and thankfully, Ben's dad came and helped. Had to drop off my car at a mechanic last night and it should hopefully be fixed today. I'm quite terrified of what this might do to my wallet though.

The silver lining- It is indeed, Friday.

There is much to smile about in spite of my unfortunate vehicle dismay. So smile, I will.

See?

Happy Friday, Folks.

Hey, have a listen to my sweet tune selection on the right ----->

me encanta el mundo.

one time i went to mexico and walked around the city of monterrey with mexican grape soda in hand, lovely amigos at my side and my camera. i loved every second of it as well as took a gazillion and one pictures. i will share one with you.

it was beautiful as you can very well see. see?

actually, it wasn't a tourist visit by any means. the picture might have fooled you. i went there on a missions trip and it was a beautiful experience. i've been twice. both beautiful and very different experiences. heartwrenching and heartwarming all at the very same time.

i heart mexico.

i need to return.

so far i've visited italy and mexico as far as other countries go. i've barely scratched the surface on my "places to go before i die" list. luckily, i don't plan on dying anytime soon. however, the sooner i can board a plane to cross the atlantic, the better.

the world is calling my name.

food and electronics.

No more cheeseburgers, french fries, cokes, chips, chocolate, etc.

MUST.STOP.NOW.

"You are what you eat"- This phrase nearly terrifies me.

Why must good food be so horribly bad for you? It's a cruel and disheartening concept. So backwards.

I love green beans. Not the canned ones, the fresh ones. Sauteed in garlic and olive oil. I could eat them every day. Probably not though. Too much of anything isn't a good thing. Am I right or am I right?

I want the new iphone. I've never owned an iphone and as cliche and cheesy as it sounds, they fascinate me. My blackberry is pretty sweet but pales in comparison to a slick iphone 4G. In order to get said iphone, i must cancel my contract with verizon resulting in a 200 dollar fee (ouch) and then of course signing a new contract with AT&T and then paying out the wazoo for the new iphone. In the end, I'll probably come out of pocket at least 500 dollars if not more. Screw that. My blackberry will just have to suffice.

Wahhhh :(

Last year I spent my life savings on a Canon Rebel XSi that has fallen into category as the second love of my life since Ben came into the picture. Basically, it's my baby and I take it everywhere I go. It's been dropped a time or two (not admitting whether or not it was my fault but it wasn't both times- dangit, i just told on myself). Baby camera is sick though. Sad day. Luckily I bought one of those scam 3 year extended warranties that every store pushes on you when you purchase an electronic item that costs a mighty pretty penny. I caved and paid an insane amount for said warranty. I'm actually going to be using it though. I have to send my camera away and that frightens me but she desperately needs to get better because I'm going insane without being able to take photos.

INSANE.

I'd love to have a macbook. My PC has a virus. I can't afford to get it fixed.

I just don't have the best of luck with electronic items. I'm not meant for snazzy things, I guess.

Dang it.

I'm outgrowing...

My once "roomy" apartment.

You know why?

Because I keep buying things like this...

And this

Which works like a charm and plays my vinyls beautifully might I add.

How am I to pass up these pieces when I paid just over 20 dollars for BOTH?

I mean, come on? Yeah, maybe I cut into my gas and grocery budget just a bit but realistically speaking here, it was impossible to turn my eye and not make the purchase.

But my house is shrinking.

I need to cool it with the obsessive used furniture shopping. In essence, my current thought process and intention is most always valid as in I say to myself, "Oh, I'm going to polish and re sell this to make money off of it". Until I get it home and see how nicely it goes with the rest of my collection and I just can't make myself part with it.

It's a viscious cycle, my friends.

One that I can't seem to break.

Cake.

"You can't have your cake and eat it too."

Ever heard that phrase? Oh, I have. Plenty of times. More than I can probably count.

I was thinking about it yesterday and came to the conclusion that it makes absolutely no sense.

Why would anyone want a piece of cake that they can't eat? What is the point of having a piece of cake that you can only stare at and inhale it's sweet aroma? That is cruel. Unless of course it's like the "forbidden cake" and if you eat it you will be poisoned and drop dead. Could very well be but couldn't you rephrase that to something along the lines of...

"You can't have your cake and eat it too because the cake will poison you"

Anyone who poisons cake is just plain cruel though.

I do realize that this is an idiom and it pertains to having or wanting more than one can handle or deserve, or trying to have two incompatible things.

But is having a piece of cake and eating it too terribly incompatible?

This aged proverb is basically saying that you can't enjoy two desirable things at the same time.

Perhaps a better way to say this would be,

"You can't eat your cake and have it too"?

Maybe?

Because after you eat your cake, you can't have it. Even though you already had it. Ah, here I go again. Typical overanalyzation.

What are your thoughts concerning this overused idiom?

I just wanna eat my cake.

Hiatus.

I'm back in full swing- at least I think so.

I needed a break from blogging. Don't we all sometimes?

No real rhyme or reason. Just felt the need to shift my focus and energy on other things for a bit.

Learning. I'm learning a lot. I'm realizing a lot.

I'm trying my best to make changes in and of myself and polish areas of my life that need polished.

It's not an easy feat, I tell you.

Silence for Baby Cohen.

I've been following Megan's blog for some time now. Please say a prayer for this precious family. They've been through so much in the last few months and Megan has shown an unreal amount of strength during what has got to be one of the most difficult things a mother and father should ever have to endure.

My heart, thoughts and prayers go out to the entire Marshall family.

Baby Cohen's memorial service is today.